Has Chris Faked It In Bed? - #14

Always Open: Has Chris Faked It In Bed? - #14

Join Barbara Dunkelman, Ashley Jenkins, Chris Demarais, and Mica Burton as they discuss misconceptions about life, faking it in bed, and asexuality. This episode is sponsored by HelloFresh (http://bit.ly/2dt9Db8) and Squarespace (http://bit.ly/2k4FDjw)

Binge Mode

More Always Open

See All Always Open Videos

Other Videos You'll Like

Comments (220)

  • AlexMai FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    2 weeks ago

    I loved everything about science camp, except I hated the rooming situation. As a child, most of my closest friends were girls, and I was never nervous or awkward around them. It wasn't until science camp (I was 11 at the time), the ban on mixed gender rooming, having separate floors for boys and girls, and never being allowed on the other floor... I heard they had overnight patrols on both floors. Ever since that trip, I felt like I was supposed to be ashamed of having female friends. Within the week, I became extremely shy and reserved around girls, and I blame being "indoctrinated" by lame policies into thinking it was wrong to hang out with girls. It's been 15 years and I still struggle with some mild remnants of the repercussions. That aspect of science camp was probably the worst experience of the first 22 years of my life, in regards to the negative impact it had on who I was as a person.

  • aferdig

    2 months ago

    Tampons also work for wound packing bullet wounds.


  • CitySelby FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    2 months ago

    On the issue of sexuality and attraction, libido more accurately hits the mark on what seemed to be termed 'desire':


    -romance: I want to share intimate emotional time with that person

    -sexual orientation: that person makes me want to bump fuzzies

    -libido: I want sexual satisfaction, this person/apparatus/my hand will do

  • kiraraneko FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold ms. obsessed

    3 months ago

    As an asexual person who listens to this show simply because I like to hear what RT personalities have to say, I'm really relieved to finally hear the topic of Asexuality come up. 

  • WelshGooner FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I submitted this shot, but their spelling of Rhys is different to mine....was it me or is there an actual Reese H. who also submited this? Imma claim it, it's a damn good shot :P

  • RJ_James FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Of course guys are better at giving blowjob than girls - well, at least I think so.

  • brucethegirl FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Fanfiction literally taught me so much, and now with romance novels today they're much better and more realistic. 

  • ShalashaskaOcelot

    4 months ago

    -45:49 It loses the realism when you can see she's legit reading "it. would. have. cost. a. lot. more..." 

  • Wirewolf FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I just had to come back and thank Mica because I had never heard of AO3 before, and I have been on this site basically all of the past week.

  • mkslovesacting FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Queen of the Universe

    4 months ago

    All of my male friends talked about faking it in bed, and actually most of them said that they have at some point, for the same reason Chris said.

    • York995 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      It's a thing that happens


  • SarahWithStars FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold No Family Bias- Honest

    4 months ago

    I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom

  • MRKRABBZz FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Is barb bi? 

    • LazarouDave FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Can't afford Double Gold

      4 months ago

      I don't believe so - think she's one of the very few at RT who is straight, although i can't be certain

  • JSTYX Punching life in the FAC

    4 months ago

    Yeah, ace talk! *sits backwards on a chair, all cool-like*


    So, the TLDR version: 


    Heterosexuality: Fuck that

    Homosexuality: Fuck this

    Bisexuality: Fuck that too

    Pansexuality: Fuck everything

    Demisexuality: Fuck, maybe

    Autosexuality: Fuck me

    Asexuality: Fuck no. 


  • TheOminousApparition God, I'm cool.

    4 months ago

    I'm an open minded person. But I believe that there are only 2 genders. Male and Female. And I will accpet the very, very rare occasion in which a person is born with both genetalia, being a hemaphrodite. That's all. This does not mean I don't acknowledge transgender and area's where you are biologically changing your self to become what ever, I don't mind that and fully support that. But it is fact that there are only 2 and the rare chance of 3 genders. Now, Gay, Straight, Bisexual and Asexual are the only sexualities I am willing to accept. And that one where you love absolute everything. But these ones where they just take a bunch of words and letter, smash them together and call that a new sexuality is beyond my comprehension. I'm sexual identify as an Ndiethylmetatoluamide-sexual. Its just.. why the complexity of a name for something that can literally be defined for something else with the EXACT DEFINITION with a already widely accepted and simple name. Or even if a sexuality is adjusted in the slightest bit, the people who are apart of that certain sexuality are so "entitled" to a completely re-branding of their sexuality. I do realise most people do not fit into that catagory of those feminazi's or white knights who are infamously known across the internet, because this is the rooster teeth community. The most creative, caring and intelligent group of individuals out there. I just can't understand why those certain people feel that way. Sorry if you have taken offence, but this is the internet. Deal with it.

    • Tannar33 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      I mean you say that it is a fact there are only two genders, when gender itself is an entirely social construct that is at its core subjective, so... honestly you're just sticking your head in the sand and ignoring a wealth of historical and cultural information which demonstrates the arbitrary nature of gender as a concept.

      Basically, it is not a fact at all... it's a precedent put forward by a society which has made bread out of destroying alternative ways of thinking, so that it... it, when we observe that male and female genders are established in society, we can't escape acknowledging that we have this perception because we have erased all the alternative paradigms. We have this perception, but no part of it is an objective fact, and our labelling based on genitalia is also so subjective, full stop. Especially considering that all use of language and definition is arbitrary. The only reason we label one organism male and another female is because we have decided that those sexual (as in the difference between sex and gender) labels relate to our gender preconceptions.

      Moving on from that to the issue of choosing labels. It isn't so much the complexity of a name, but the accuracy, an accuracy which goes toward the heart of a group and toward putting forward a word-symbol that will be assimilated sooner rather than later by the judgmental (honestly shitty) society, where all dichotomy is seen as a threat to their established and stable way of life.

      I'm sorry that people's genuine identities are "beyond your comprehension." On a very real level, get over it. *sighs and shrugs* Even if you can't understand it you need to stop belittling it, and honestly you seem smart enough to get past your mental blocks and realize through discussion why a group chooses a certain term to represent them.

      I am a writer, specifically a poet, an arena of writing in which word choice is perhaps more important than any other. I once said in a writing class that we were "splitting hairs" over a word choice, and my professor looked at me and said flatly, "that's what we're here to do." Since then I understand how synonyms carry different weights, even based wholly on their phonetic sound. All of this impacts how we view an object/subject, and when those subjects are human beings who are struggling to define themselves and be recognized in the size and scope of a society which flat denies that they exist or matter... the presentation and rhetorical impact matters.

      There's also a disconnect between believing that there are only two genders based on genitalia ("sometimes a third," paraphrasing) and the notion of accepting and celebrating transgender individuals. Like... those two notions are entirely at odds. If you think there are only two genders determined by genitalia, you cannot support or accept transgender human beings in their genuine identity; one statement undermines the next. ...Sorry, you're not transphobic (necessarily) but it is important to reconcile that, because... you need to commit to one side. Either transgender people are their gender or they are not, and either you feel their gender is decided by their genitalia or you don't.

      --Signed,
      The straight man standing on the corner, cis and white, aware that he has been given these deep-set privileges... that I benefit from your mistreatment.

    • TheOminousApparition God, I'm cool.

      4 months ago

      Honestly, I have not spoken to someone like you ever before on this subject. As you can tell, my parents are very much only 2 genders and only 2 sexualities. I was raised to believe as such. I am young, 15 to be exact, and I'm still trying to learn more about gender and sexualities and to see where it all stands today. Where I live is heavily biased. My school is also like that as well. I had to teach my self by talking to others over the Internet to inform my self on where everything stands in modern society. I wish to inform you that I am not ignoring anything or stopping myself from believing certain things. What I said was just my current standpoint on things after talking with people in a group online and they did open my eyes to new things. But you definitely made things 100% more clear and I'd honestly like to say thank you. Of course I'm not completely informed and think I no longer need any more knowledge on this, because I think I'm just scratching the surface. I also would like to apologise for the things I said in my message about mocking the sexualities. Also, I must of not expressed my self enough when I said "Beyond my comprehension" wasn't meant to be taken literal. It was meant to be taken as "There is so much information being taken in I can hardly keep up with it."

  • PhantomAC FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Not Otaku, Just Nerd

    4 months ago

    I'm going to have to give Chris this credit about Asexuality,.. it IS more productive.


    ((backed up by 'equivalent exchange',.. to gain, you should offer-up))


    The head games are no joke, (although there are many) but finding solace in a black and white world is agonizing. Ask any 'judged' human. When EVERY stereotype puts you at the bottom of the list, (like AO disucussed with highschool classes- no, not the study kind- the clique kind.) it gets a bit hateful and hopeless.


    Thank you AO for going 'there'. (and being positive in your efforts)


    Keep up the open mind!

  • NikoFord FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    33 year old panromantic/demisexual virgin here. It's definitely annoying to live in a world that markets to and only really thinks to include those who experience sexual attraction but having sex is not going to make someone who doesn't feel sexual attraction get in on the conversation. The ability to have and enjoy sex is unrelated to the ability to find people sexually attractive. I know several people who identify as asexual or as on the Ace spectrum who are married and have kids or simply have active sex lives. Yes, there are asexuals who find sex repulsive but someone can be heterosexual and feel that same way. Sexuality is defined by what turns you on, not by what you get off to. If you have any questions, I'm here to help. 

     

    • TheOminousApparition God, I'm cool.

      4 months ago

      What the hell is a panromantic/demisexual? Did you just make that up? What the flipity fuck?

  • Glitterybullshit

    4 months ago

    Anyone else find it much easier to put a tampon in without an applicator?  speak_no_evil

    • universe93 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold just killed a deer

      4 months ago

      in other countries (like australia) they don't even sell tampons with applicators. i'd had my period for like 7 years before found out what applicators were lol. we just buy tampons, alone, with no applicator

  • Tannar33 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Lllleettss define these terms.

    I am Demisexual/ACE-flux (but alloromantic) and my best friend is greysexual, and I feel like I have an okay grasp on this. Asexuality isn't necessarily just a lack of desire to have sex, it can also be a lack of sexual or physical attraction. Aromanticism is either a lack of desire for romantic relationships or a lack of romantic attraction.

    This all being a spectrum, of course, from allosexuality/alloromanticism (forming regular sexual/romantic attractions or a having a frequent desire for those things) to the ACEs.

    Demisexual and demiromantic mean essentially that you need an emotional connection, often a deep one or even, in the case of demisexuality an emotional attraction, in order to form a physical or romantic one.

    Greysexual/greyromantic means you often do not feel any sexual or romantic attraction, but sometimes, often with specific people, you do. This is different than dems in that whether or not someone feels these attractions doesn't necessarily correlate to a emotional connection.

    For me as a demisexual, when I form an emotional attraction to someone what follows is usually a physical attraction; in fact, I frequently form physical attractions based only on deep emotional connections even when an emotional attraction doesn't exist. But for my best friend, when she forms an emotional attraction it is not often followed up by a physical one. So, greysexuals/grey romantics are like dems, but further down the line.

    • TheOminousApparition God, I'm cool.

      4 months ago

      Honestly, what the fuck is a demisexual and the ACE-flux? I swear to god you just made that up.

    • Tannar33 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      Like... explained demixexual in the comment, and it has existed for thousands of years as a concept and we have documentation of this... so didn't make that up. And fluidity on the spectrum of sexuality and asexuality is not at all a new concept; also didn't make that up, lol. ACE-flux means that I recognize that my sexuality is fluid. As a straight man... I most often need an emotional connection to feel a physical attraction, but there are times where I can still feel physically attracted to complete strangers. And this is drastically different from times in my life when I have been utterly unable to fell any attraction to people other than those I was most close with. Hence... "ACE" (as a moniker for asexual or the asexuality spectrum) and "flux" like "fluctuate."

      On another level... a simple google search could avoid all this misunderstanding...

  • MartyGras2

    4 months ago

    Another great Always Open.  Thank you :)

  • Rainonkimsrainbows

    4 months ago

    The most movie thing I've seen irl was when I was going home from Yosemite Nat. Park (not driving) and a truck was going the other direction on the highway and the entire bottom of the truck was engulfed in flames. It was trailing behind the truck and when I turned around to look I never saw them pull over or anything. They just kept going #MadRespect

  • Aferdig7 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    i really like how you guys handled the topic of asexuality. as an asexual i hate the idea of sex. im also not attracted to anyone but there are some people who are enjoyable to look at (scarlett johansson and chris hemsworth). but i am panromantic meaning i love the idea of a relationship and i'm fine cuddling/kissing also i flirt with everything that moves.  

  • phoebeanne14 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold phoebe

    4 months ago

    one of my teachers told us a story in health class from when she was a teenager and was wearing a tampon whilst at the beach in a bikini. She was sitting on his shoulders and the cotton string got caught on his watch and her tampon came out. He was horrified, so were the boys in my class. My friends and I have never laughed so much in my life. Btw my teacher thought it was hilarious at the time it happened so it was all good   elyse

  • Zucat FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Applicators aren't normal things in Australia, I was 25 before I even saw one in a shop. 

  • Nolanster Canadian

    4 months ago

    mica is the worst

  • phileh FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    • Tannar33 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      What, she gave great advice, especially on the Asexuality issue, and she consistently gives great advice that takes into account complex issues of intersectional identity.

      Just because someone isn't telling you what you want to hear doesn't mean they aren't right, like...

  • outgoingchart7

    4 months ago

    I hate how they kept over talking Chris when he was trying to say something. 

  • ripREV123 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    TIL women in America don't use non-applicator tampons.

  • RavenSugara FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    the more those fingers go down the more I respect and like and want to be friends with all of them.


    Also I tend to forget who Mica's father is most of the time because Mica is so great and my favorite, but +5000 for the story of the cell phone

  • KalebGrimm24 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    "I'm a blowjob pro I don't need a napkin."


    Well......now I have a situation.

  • Fishpit FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Some dude.

    4 months ago

    Around the 30 minute mark, Ashley had me in hysterics. It really sounded like she'd already tried really hard to light a car on fire, like a little pyro. So surprised none of them picked up on this.
    "It takes an awful lot to set a car on fire. -eyes widen-  Ya know that?"

    Brilliant. Subtle, but brilliant.

  • DEOTIUS FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    i have the same problem.most of  my coworkers do not believe that i am asexual and are always badgering me about being a virgin still and always asking me if i would do her or or do her and it really gets annoying having to tell them no and then them getting angry at me saying "now come on that is not your real answer, that is just a cop out." i really enjoy my coworkers to death but it is getting to the point where i don't want to work with them any more, i have been with most of them for nine years now. on the porn thing i had worked in a porn shop for two years form age 18 to 20.

    sorry for the rant.

    • alatyr13 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      Dont feel sorry for the rant! Stuff like that sucks!

  • ViriCrespo FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I haven't finished the video, I'm still watching, but asexuality does have a spectrum. All sexuality have a spectrum, I believe, as well as aromanticism. For me, my asexuality does fluctuate. I tend to go with 'aceflux' bc how I feel about anything sexual can change depending on whatever. I do know, though, I have the thought process of "I do not want a dick in me I don't want it anywhere near me." and I don't think that'll ever change. Still, thank you for talking about this and being so open-minded about asexuality. It makes it all better.

  • lorisasaki FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold LoriSasaki

    4 months ago

    (I'm a girl) First time I learned about a clitoris was listening to Eminem's The Real Slim Shady: 


    "And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
    And expect them not to know what a women's clitoris is.
    Of course they gonna know what intercourse is, by the time they hit 4th grade"


    and I'm thinking...I DON'T know what a woman's clitoris is. And I was definitely past 4th grade. 

    • tahupierce FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      You must not have had the Discovery Channel

  • AniPendragon

    4 months ago

    I mean Sydney could be neither male nor female. Non-binary people exist.

  • ajsyav FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Ashley talking about the movie 100 Girls? Wow, who knew that movie would ever be referenced again. 

  • MandopolisZone FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I really want Mica's "Yandere Extreme Love Club" shirt; it looks so badass


    Update: I found it! Yaaaay! https://www.creatorsguild.co/products/yandere-love-club-sleevless-top 

    (if any of you all want one too)

  • Montana_AU FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Meg Turney would be an awesome special guest to have on Always Open. 

  • harnsolo

    4 months ago

    y'all wanna talk about high school misconceptions: i was in competitive show choir for all four years of high school and it was right when glee was getting big. let me just say. it was an experience

    • harnsolo

      4 months ago

      and i can confirm the taped doors on overnight trips parents are crazy

  • trashkuma FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold cool kid

    4 months ago

    i'm so glad the conversation about asexuality was handled so well and with such an open-mindedness to it. i remember identifying as asexual for a while when i was younger and while i no longer do so i'm still very much in support of the community itself so its so cool that more people are talking about it. it's great to see that even if they may not know too much about it theyre still genuinely accepting and willing to learn <3

  • iWRESTLEDaLION2 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I feel like Chris should be on more than he is.

  • DrknssRules1 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Did the "Never Have I Ever" along with them, didn't drop a single finger. I need to get out more.

  • TylerAmy FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    I love the fact that Geordi La Forge microwaved his phone! XD

  • matt_lech FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    What is the difference between being "asexual" and just having absolutely so "sex drive"

  • Hellotardis FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Russell Richardson

    4 months ago

    Chris Demaris is a goddamn National treasure. 

  • derohk FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    i loooove micas shirt xD

  • ytrahne FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Guardian x6

    4 months ago

    Played along.  Out at the same point as Ashley.

  • ProfEyebrow FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    Just a clarifying note about aromanticism, aro people aren't interested in relationships, but they are attracted to people and interested in sex/kissing/cuddling. They just don't want romance the way asexual people don't want sex.

  • ducewilliams FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    4 months ago

    show was "is it a good idea to microwave this?"

  • CatSea FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Keyblade Apprentice

    4 months ago

    I went to a Catholic high school and there weren't really any clicks. Everyone just hung out with whoever. I ran an anime club and it was the most popular club in the school, with people from all kind of groups in it. 

    Though funnily enough our school had more visits by the police than any of the public schools in our area, even the one that was in the middle of downtown. 

    And well.. our sex-ed class was severely lacking. I'm grateful for this podcast because being a 24 year old virgin I have no idea about any of this stuff aside from fanfiction. And I never actually knew how to use a tampon until this episode! ^^;;;

  • MikeEvans94 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Mike

    4 months ago

    That microwave show Mica mentioned, is "Is It a Good Idea to Microwave This?" from the guys at Jogwheel :) I like when my new favourite show mentions a classic :D

    • ducewilliams FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      Sad they fell apart.

    • chrisyroid FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      4 months ago

      They didn't fall apart. Jon Paula didn't want the series to run dry and the guys moved to different states so they're an hour apart from each other. Also he's doing an anniversary special pretty soon.